horrible morning

this morning i sent 3 kids out in 5 minutes during first hour, and asked one if she thought her behavior made her a badass. and i said the word “idiots” under my breath which one of them heard, making me feel horrible. then i had to have a sit down with administrators about being the professional adult in the room. i get that i am the one in charge/control, but even i have limits. i want so badly for my kids to be successful, and most of them work when certain rogue personalities aren’t in the room. i just hate being reprimanded for caring about everyone else in the room. yes, i should have handled the situation better, but the rest of the students worked their asses off the rest of the hour, once the disturbances were gone. the system is terribly flawed, but if we want kids to keep working, to really succeed, we have to have high standards, and sometimes we have to reach them on their level. uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuugh.